To invite people over should always be pleasant for the host, that is why it is important to remember that the art of hosting means simplicity so that guests can feel at home. One of the first things to keep in mind is the dressing code. The hostess should not be dressed nor too elegantly nor to simply as this can embarrass the guests, specially female guests. She should wear an elegant but sober dress and should not exaggerate with the jewelry. Before the guests arrive take some minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when they arrive. Touch up your makeup and be fresh-looking. Greed your guests with a splendid smile.

INVITATION CARDS

First of all the guest list and the date of the reception should be chosen. The hostess should contact each guest telephonically at least fifteen days before the reception ( many say that seven days anticipation is good enough). Invitation cards are used only for special occasions such as weddings. When making the phone call it is important to be precise and to indicate the date and hour of the invitation. Once you’ve had the confirmation of your guests you will know exactly how many people will be attending the reception. From this moment on, you should concentrate on a day by day schedule for a proper organization of the evening.

HOW TO LAY THE TABLE

An attractive table is a sign of welcome to guests but also a very important element for a successful meal. First cover the table with a silence cloth or a quilted pad to protect it from stains and wrecks. Afterwards place a perfectly laundered cloth that hangs 30 cm down the sides of the table. If your tablecloth is not very long you can try this romantic arrangement: with a nice satin or taffeta cloth dress the table to the floor and use your tablecloth on top. Naturally, the color of the cloth is very important thus it has to blend in with the plates , cutlery and centrepiece. You can lay the table in another way, called “all’Americana”, using individual place mats in straw, linen, cotton, with fine embroidery, etc. If the serving table is not uniform or in perfect shape, it is better to use a table cloth. A glass table can be also used.
Have the tablecloth and napkins spotless, and perfectly pressed. If it’s been a long time since their last use it’s better to control them in advance and iron them properly. There is always a dinner set for everyday use and another for 'special occasions' therefore the last one should be properly washed and cleaned in order to be used.
At formal dinners a handsome plate known as the service plate is placed for each guest. In this style of service the place before the guest is always occupied by a plate on which the other plates are positioned. These plates can be of various types, precious silver, colourful ceramic, varnished metal, crystal or simple glass, wood or wicker for a more rustic style table. Whatever kind of service plate is used, it is important that it matches the tablecloth and the other plates.
If a service plate is used place the flat plate over it, otherwise, if you prefer the classic way of laying the table, place it directly over the table cloth. When soup forms the first course, soup plates are placed directly over the flat plates. Soup can be either served from a soup tureen from the table or presented already in the plate.
At formal dinners, soup should be presented already on the table. This should be done just before sitting at the table, thus the guest should find the soup plate half full as he or she takes his o her seat. At informal dinners soup can be served directly at the table. Place the soup tureen on a tray and make the portions, then pass them to every guest. If you wish to serve the consommé you should use the proper cup and saucer. If served as a complement to starters, cup and saucer should be placed to the right hand side of the guest. Otherwise, if served as a first course, cup and saucer should be set on top of the flat plate located in front of the guest.
Bread and breadsticks (grissini) are set on the individual bread plates placed to the left hand side of the main plate. The most refined table should have bread plates in silver, specially if silver cutlery is used; but bread plates in fine china, crystal or glass, are also elegant since they complement almost every kind of dinner set.
Another important plate is the salad plate. It can be normal or half moon shaped and should be positioned in front of the main dish slightly to the left side. This plate should be presented just before serving the salad and as a good rule should be taken away before the next course.
Now that the plates have been taking care of, we should choose the cutlery.
The most noble material used for cutlery and that which should always figure on a refined and elegant table is silver. On the other hand, simple cutlery that harmonize with the plates is always elegant. We all know that cutlery should be placed on the sides of the dish according to the order they are used in, in fact the ones which are further from the dish are those which are used first.
Forks are placed at the left hand side of the dish with their tines up; two large forks (main course forks) if the first course consists of pasta or risotto, one fish fork and one large fork if the main course is fish. At the right hand side of the dish the knives are placed with their blade towards the dish. First comes the large knife (main course knife) followed by a fish knife if fish is served. If fish is not on the menu, no other knifes should be placed, eventually they should be brought in with the other plates.
If soup is served as a first course, a soup spoon must be placed next to the knife; or a smaller spoon if consommé is served instead. Many people place medium size forks on the right side of the dish for dry first courses. Dessert spoons and forks are placed horizontally in front of the each dish and if necessary a dessert knife with the blade facing the dish can be inserted in between. Both dessert spoon and dessert knife should have their handle towards right, while the dessert fork’s handle towards left. Fruit knife and fork must be placed on the fruit plate before it is served on the table. The same should be done when cheese is served; having in mind that is only served in the evening.
Glasses: for a complete set of table glasses, at least four different sizes are necessary for each table companion. They should be laid in front of the dish: the large glass for water is positioned in the center, at it’s right hand side a medium size glass for red wine and next to it a smaller glass for white wine (if served). Finally, if champagne is served one more glass (the flute glass) is usually placed behind the red wine glass, lightly shifted to the right.
Napkins: it seems there are more than 200 ways of folding the napkin; but we will see just a few simple ways of doing it. Napkins should be placed on the right hand side or left hand side of the dish; or just directly over the dish itself. They should be folded either in a square or in a triangle.; avoiding irregular forms seen in some public eating places.
Seating labels
Seating labels are not strictly necessary but are a fun way of giving and extra touch of colorful originality and femininity. They range from the most precious, in silver or gold, to the most simple: little bunches of fresh, dried or silk flowers; that if properly elaborated in harmony with the tablecloth can be an authentic refinement.
After a very intimate invitation it is very polite to give each guest their seating label. In this case, seating labels can be different from each other adapting to the personality and taste of each guest. It is always important to remember not to exaggerate in originality and to keep them simple and refined.
The guests should find the seating labels in the table, in front of the plate, with their title and surname written out in a full, notorious way: “ Mister Rossi”, “Doctor Green”, etc. If however the guests are close friends, it is sufficient to write their first names, never their surnames.

The centerpiece
This is essential for the decoration of the table. Not only flowers exist for decorating the table. In fact centerpiece compositions can be done with different kinds of materials: the classics flowers go always well, but also fruits, berries, dried corns, valuables in silver, china, crystal, glass, or peasant materials etc, provided that they adapt to the table’s dinner set, to the width and to the shape of the table, and that they bond with the whole. There are but very precise norms which should be followed and the first is that the centerpiece should be not high enough to obstruct the view across the table, therefore better a little too low than a too high centerpiece; in-sum everybody should be able to see each other while making conversation. Moreover the centerpiece should not be too cumbersome in order not to crowd the table excessively. If the table is round the centerpiece should be of round shape, if instead the table it is oval or rectangular, the ideal centerpiece is of a lengthened shape.

On a very long table the main decoration should be distributed along the greater axis, also with other smaller compositions that go from the center to sides, and that can be joined with flowers or leaves laid on the tablecloth, or small pieces of silverware, china or other materials.
The containers that will have to hold the flowers can be very vary: silver, china, crystal, glass, ceramics, most colorful if they must harmonize with the table cloth, or of neutral color if the composition of the flowers will cover them completely. We have seen that the centerpiece should be low enough in order not to prevent to the guests from seeing themselves therefore it is obvious that also the containers for the flowers should be low, wide and sufficiently long.

Over a long table flowers can be perfectly matched with chandeliers placed to the sides of the centerpiece or one in between two floral decorations. Even if the candles in kind are rather high the guest’s view will not be obstructed. It is wise to remember that the candles, as for the rest of silverware pieces used for the centerpiece, should be reserved for dinner invitations. The candles, always inserted in their own candleholder (you can find them made of glass, small and economic, mostly adapted for this use) will look very good also if inserted between the flowers of the decorations.

For the Christmas lunch and for New Year's eve dinner extravagancy is allowed to the maximum, both for the centerpiece and for the seating labels; the materials to prepare the decorations are in fact many: Christmas flowers, gold or silver sprayed leaves and berries, fresh fruit and dried fruit (all the citruses, pineapple, chestnuts with and without the curl etc),red and green ribbons, most likeable, the little statues of the Nativity set or small paper firs, or the colorful Christmas tree decorations arranged in glass containers.

An original centerpiece and very adapt for the autumnal months can be composed of white bunches of large grape, sprayed with silver paint and arranged at the center of a rectangular or oval table, and carefully laid down on small green ivy leaves and adorned with flowers of several colors threaded in between the clusters. The flowers will have to be tiny: small roses as an example, or, small orchids for the more spendious. The centerpiece will be perfect with the addition of two candles of a color that matches the table cloth and arranged between the grape clusters to sides of the composition.